30 July, 2011


The world turned upside down

Some African missionaries came round this morning, hoping to convert the people in my street to Christianity.

I didn't open the door. Instead I got down on my hands and knees and called

Il n'y a personne ici que nous poulets
through the letterbox, and made loud clucking noises until they went away. I wonder if that'll get reported in the Lagos Journal of Anthropology.

Funny old world. Innit.

That's quite something - missionaries coming from the Corrupt Basket Case of the Entire World, where millions starve, and more millions attempt to kill each other on a regular basis, and where aid money gets squirreled away to Zurich and elsewhere.......

....... to spread the word of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to the natives here.

One might imagine their efforts would be better directed to saving their fellow Africans.

We get the occasional Skyfairy (Voodoo division) visitors - sooner or later they always ask for a donation.

Always keep a cheque made payable to "GOD ALMIGHTY" or couple of fake air tickets to Mogadishu by the front door is my top tip.

Christian Missionaries in your street? Where I live they would have a hell of job persuading the locals to convert.

You know, the ones who don't celebrate Christmas.


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