07 March, 2011
Non-story of the day
Last Saturday the EDL held a fairly modest gig in Rochdale to highlight the issue of "Asians" grooming underage White girls for prostitution, a problem which seems particularly rife in that benighted part of the country. As it happened, Stacey Dolan and Mark Roberts were getting spliced at the town hall at the time. The Mail tries to make something of it,
Yes, OK. What if there'd been roadworks going on or a burst water-main or something, with drilling audible during the ceremony and nasty rough men in hard hats and hi-viz jackets in the background of the photography? So either a) make a feature of it, something you can point out when showing people your wedding album in years to come (for example, you can pretend that the line of coppers is there to hold back all the paparazzi and the crowd of screaming, over-excited Mark and Stacey fans), or b) take the pictures from a different angle or, if necessary, at the sodding reception. Anyway, dear, if you're going to get married in your underwear, you're really in no position to complain.
I mean, Gordon Bennett, my parents got married in 1945. My dad had to rebuild the bombed-out church with his bare hands and there was such a shortage of priests my mam had to knit one herself before the ceremony could go ahead.
But as non-stories dreamt up in the name of the drip-drip-drip approach to political proper gander go, you can hardly beat this one,
Interesting word order, incidentally: "stood against Jack Straw for BNP" reads as if Nick Holt (for it was he) and Mr Straw were competing to be selected as BNP candidate. Hidden depths, that geezer Jack "show us your pretty face, you delightful little Muslima sweetie-pie" Straw.
Yes, OK. What if there'd been roadworks going on or a burst water-main or something, with drilling audible during the ceremony and nasty rough men in hard hats and hi-viz jackets in the background of the photography? So either a) make a feature of it, something you can point out when showing people your wedding album in years to come (for example, you can pretend that the line of coppers is there to hold back all the paparazzi and the crowd of screaming, over-excited Mark and Stacey fans), or b) take the pictures from a different angle or, if necessary, at the sodding reception. Anyway, dear, if you're going to get married in your underwear, you're really in no position to complain.
I mean, Gordon Bennett, my parents got married in 1945. My dad had to rebuild the bombed-out church with his bare hands and there was such a shortage of priests my mam had to knit one herself before the ceremony could go ahead.
But as non-stories dreamt up in the name of the drip-drip-drip approach to political proper gander go, you can hardly beat this one,
C4 'Come Dine With Me' contestant stood against Jack Straw for BNP
Let's see if I can get my tiny brain round this one. A participant in a minor "reality TV" programme, in which people are invited to dinner in each other's homes, also happens to be a BNP activist. That's a story? It basically equates to "BNP/EDL/whatever man caught breathing in public. Decent people terribly shocked." It's not even up to the standard of the saga of Julian Leppert's number plate, which at least demonstrated a modicum of painfully contorted imagination. (I can barely contain my indifference waiting for 2021 when the "NA21" plates come out.)Interesting word order, incidentally: "stood against Jack Straw for BNP" reads as if Nick Holt (for it was he) and Mr Straw were competing to be selected as BNP candidate. Hidden depths, that geezer Jack "show us your pretty face, you delightful little Muslima sweetie-pie" Straw.