22 August, 2010


Not quite the effect he had hoped for

One of my neighbours has a flash motor. Don't ask me what breed it is — as a non-driver I lack the motivation to acquire the encylopædic knowledge of passenger vehicles that many people seem to possess. But it's something of the GTi with extra pepperoni persuasion with a flash spoiler over the boot and a custom painted design on the sides. None of your Halford's stick-on go-faster stripes here.

My neighbour is well proud of his sexy jam jar and spends hours tinkering with it and tuning the engine. Very occasionally he gets into it and drives round the block at the blistering 30mph the law allows before coming back and debriefing the engine. Or something like that.

It really is most impressive stuff. Or it would be but for one thing. Whenever he revs the engine, it sounds exactly like a big version of one of those flywheel-powered friction toy cars that were all the rage when ah were nobbut a chilt misel'. I always fall about laughing. I hope he never revs it up when I'm passing; I really wouldn't want to embarrass the poor lad.

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