13 August, 2010
It's the silly season, innit?
Anyway, the massed newshounds of the UK, including the Mail and, with a rather more succinct headline, the Stroud News and Journal reveal to a shocked nation:
SQUASHED HEDGEHOG PAINTED YELLOWIt's the vox pops that make you despair
Shocked mother-of-four Allison Hart could not believe the dead animal was not removed by the painters, who blitzed Hartlepool streets ahead of hundreds of thousands of visitors arriving to see the Tall Ships Races.and
"They knocked on people's doors to get them to move their cars, but whoever did this didn't even ask for a shovel to move the poor hedgehog."I trust the authorities are offering these poor traumatized folk counselling.
A council spokestart adds
"This is obviously an unfortunate incident, but it was the only one reported during the massive project."I'm sure that lessons will be learned and that Hartlepool will set up a Squashed Hedgehog Hotline next time.
Gordon Bennett! (Or, since we're in the middle of the Proms season, Richard Rodney Bennett!)
Update (five minutes later)
Clearly my skills in luring providence into temptation are undiminished. It is now pissing down.